Mission Five: Greatest Good
In our home, we’re constantly working on the concept of the “family unit.” The idea being that the actions and behaviors of one affect all.
With two Gentlemen-in-Training, this proves to be especially difficult. Little boys (at least ours) can be hot-headed, stubborn, and inconsiderate. Let’s just say they’re working on their diplomacy.
When Mommy and Daddy lose their patience, we don’t help build such skills. In fact, we simply offer them new and exciting ways to be rude.
This past week, we were passing around the mad potato. Much like a hot potato, once you held it, you wanted to get rid of it, but unfortunately once you had it, it was yours and it was not good.
That anger hung over us for a whole week. Diplomacy was out the door. Short, curt, austere were the modus operandi.
Contracts were even drawn up.
Is this simply a work and school week phenomenon, I thought, sensing an ease in relations as we rounded toward Friday.
Perhaps.
But I also noticed that as the mad potato cooled on its own, we gradually righted ourselves in the midst of conflict and thus resumed contributing to the greater good.
Steps we took to give each other that precious time and space included:
• Alone time for each parent
• Periodic separation of the boys
• One-on-one time with each parent/kid
• Open communication between Mom and Dad
• Walks in nature (personally, the most therapeutic for me)
• Pizza
So, is conflict and tension necessary for good family relations?
Maybe not at face value, however I can see how it forces you to get back on track with what’s best, not only for each member of the unit, but for the unit itself.
A trusted friend and colleague of mine suggests that when faced with challenges, big decisions, or troubles, before falling asleep, you should place your hand over your heart and say to the universe, “I am in need of guidance. Please show me the path to my greatest good.”
A dream that night usually reveals what to do.
So can we do this any time? Even in the midst of a stressful week at the height of our waking hours?
I think we should and we must. I’ll be teaching this to my boys along with their diplomacy skills. And I suppose every human on the planet could benefit from this skill, too. Try it tonight, for the greater good of humanity.
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This post is republished on Medium.
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Photo credit: Unsplash
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